Time Passages
My sister called me last night to tell me a mutual friend (someone she loved deeply and I knew and loved) had died — alone and quietly in his house just steps from the beach.
Those of you who read this blog and the magazine will know that the beach is my favorite place in the world.
To me, “the beach” is not necessarily a warm tropical place with white sand and palm trees (although I do like that particular scenario). To me, the beach is a real place — winter or summer — hot or cold — it’s where I find peace of mind. It’s where I watch the ebb and flow of the tide and think about the ebb and flow of life.
I was at the beach with my sister on Sunday — an unseasonably warm New England afternoon we could not resist as our “last chance” this year. We ate lunch, walked for nearly an hour, basked in the sun and even dipped in the ocean. It was cold, but I was determined to set a personal record of Oct. 21 - last day of the season in the water.
Our friend, who was loved by more people than he ever understood or accepted, may have been gone while we were savoring our last day of summer. He died because he succumbed to his own demons – demons he couldn’t push away even though he was buttressed by the love of too many people to count.
His death will leave a hole in my life, but it will forever affect our mutual loved ones. I’ll remember the good times - dancing at a party (my bad knee collapsed and he was mortified); offbeat singalongs (he declined to take center stage, but always sang along); and a kiss on the cheek the last time I saw him — in mid-August at a gathering where I was assembling an antipasto — he picked at the plate and gave me a hello kiss as I swatted his hand.
I realize my fellow GT bloggers write about travel. I seem to be drawn to reflections on life. Thanks for indulging me.
October 24th, 2007 at 12:20 am
I enjoy your posts as I enjoy Fran’s rants, Dick’s adventures, everybody’s. I think it all makes a nice “web” (no pun intended) of perspectives and outlooks in the business traveler life which is enriching and entertaining. They also show the faces and thoughts of *real* people behind the magazine, how they go through ordinary ordeals like everybody, even though it can happen in Singapore or Qatar which is miles away (no pun intended either) from being ordinary. Basically what I am saying is that you keep it real and that’s wonderful
That said, I would like you to know that I am very sorry for your loss. It is never easy, and words can help only so much but I do hope you all find comfort on each other and strength to move on, happily, as I am absolutely sure, he would like you to.
Be well,
Fabiano
October 24th, 2007 at 1:12 pm
Hi Lisa,
I’m so sorry to hear about your loss. It never gets easier, but thank you for sharing.
October 24th, 2007 at 1:31 pm
Nice writing in this blog piece.
October 25th, 2007 at 1:59 pm
Hi Lisa,
I popped onto the GT site by chance and came across this post. I was at a family funeral myself on Sunday, so I found your reflections apt. I just wanted to send my condolences.
Love, Kathryn
October 29th, 2007 at 4:43 am
Hi Lisa,
I was sorry to read about your loss. I’ve learned there are no right, or wrong feelings in hard
times, but it always good to hear and share the memories.
All my best,
Alex